Domestic Violence on Children

The Long Term Effects of Domestic Violence on Children

If you're in an abusive relationship and have kids, but don't quite have the strength, the willpower, the resources, or the conviction to finally leave, read on to learn why it's imperative for the sake of your children that you do so as soon as possible.
As we know, domestic violence can tear families apart and cause one to feel helpless and alone. But, what many people fail to realize is the damaging long term effects of domestic violence on children, even years and years after the abuse has stopped. It's a fact that an estimated one third of all children living in a home with domestic violence will develop some sort of emotional problem.
Children of any age are like sponges, absorbing both consciously and subconsciously, taking in everything around them, every event, every emotion, every argument, and every bit of violence and hatred they are exposed to. Kids of all ages also need to be surrounded by love, caring, patience, understanding, comfort, and stability. Domestic violence, on the other hand, creates an atmosphere of continual fear, insecurity, loneliness, hatred, confusion, and instability.
Older children, especially males, often feel somehow responsible for the abuse they see their mothers enduring and struggle greatly with their inability to stop it. In addition to this, studies suggest that boys who grow up seeing their fathers hitting their mothers are ten times more likely to become abusive in their own adult relationships.
Children of both sexes living in this type of environment also grow up thinking it's okay to physically abuse another human being, and girls in particular are given the impression that females are supposed to be weak and subservient, while males are supposed to be domineering and abusive.
There may also be outward signs and symptoms of the effects of domestic violence in the home, including a myriad of emotional problems such as bouts of crying, becoming withdrawn, shunning old friends, acting excessively shy, doing poorly in school, have difficulty making or keeping friends, and even acting out in school or at home and getting into trouble more and more often.
Physical signs may also result from the stress of domestic violence, such as repeated stomach aches, diarrhea, trouble sleeping, bedwetting, thumb sucking, and frequent headaches. And, as children grow older in this type of environment, more serious ramifications may occur such as repeated attempts to runaway, committing petty crimes, and even attempts to commit suicide. Children living in violent homes also run an increased risk of becoming addicted to alcohol or drugs, or both, and also repeating the pattern and becoming involved in an abusive relationship later on in life either as the abuser or the victim.
Don't make the mistake of thinking that just because your spouse isn't directly abusing your kids that they aren't being greatly affected by what they see and hear every day of their lives. Domestic violence is a crime and should be treated as such, regardless if you "love" the person or not, love your kids even more and do everything in your power to see to it that this cycle of abuse is stopped and that they can live and thrive in a healthy, loving, nurturing environment, which is what all children deserve most.